What Could've Been
by ilive4thursdays
Summary: What if Season 3 had left us with a little hope? This story starts with a completely different season 3 finale, along with a new season 4. Enjoy! Chapter 15 was updated 8-21-08!
1. Waking Up

**Hey everyone! Here is the beginning and it starts off as the season 3 finale, (post episode 3.24) which will then morph into season 4. Trust me, you will know what the cliffhanger of season 3 is because of the way it is written, but just to be safe, I'll notify you all as well to make sure you know when I'm starting my season 4.**

**I do NOT in any way own Grey's Anatomy. Simple, concise, and straight to the point, however I wish I did.**

_Sometimes, as surgeons, we feel like we're sleep walking half the time- like were not awake. But after all who can blame us? We never get sleep or at least when we get the chance to were usually not alone. Its like we aren't really awake. Each day passes us by. But once in a while we do awake and experience magical moments in our lives_.

Meredith rolled around in her bed. Too tired to get up she stared out the window. Her best friend was getting married today. She tossed and turned until her alarm clock dinged and it was 430 am. She had to get up. Slowly she managed to turn off the annoying buzzing noise that rang loud in her ear and sit up straight.

She had never realized how big her bed had been. Usually Derek had always been there. She remembered how his awful morning breath had made her giggle and how he'd managed to put up with her snoring with wax ear plugs.

But lately, lately things weren't the same. She couldn't explain it but since her accident in the water during the ferry disaster she just couldn't bring herself out of this shell; like an outer coating wrapped around her entire body, not letting anyone in. Since the disaster with Thatcher she didnt feel like opening up about any of it. All she cared about was that Cristina had found happiness and thats all she intended on thinking about.

Unlike Meredith, Cristina easily rolled out of bed. She jumped in the shower at 4 am, getting ready for work.

"What are you doing?" Burke asked walking in on her.

"Jeez!" Cristina screamed, "You scared me. I'm getting ready for work what do you think I'm doing?"

"Oh no," Burke shook his head, "you're not. Today is the big day, no you are staying here in the apartment until our wedding, then we will have the reception and it's off to our honeymoon."

Cristina had never been much of a party girl. She, unlike most, had refused to have a bachelorette party. Luckily the honeymoon was only to California not too far because she'd never been one for traveling.

"Well where are you going?" she asked in jealousy.

"I happen to have a couple of patients I need to take care of this morning, you on the other hand get to relax and just wait for my mother to get here and she'll get everything situated." Burke said.

"How am I supposed to relax with your mother here?" she asked annoyed.

Burke laughed and Cristina, with a towel around her, walked out of the shower and started to brush her teeth.

Burke answered her, "See you at the church at 4." With that he kissed her on the forehead and was off.


	2. Results

**Hey everyone! I'm so excited I brought this fic over here! I wrote it awhile ago, after the season 3 disaster, and have about 10 chapters already written, but the story is not yet finished. So I will continue to post when I get a chance. Hope you all enjoy, and comments are always welcomed and appreciated.**

**The first couple of chapters are short, but they will get longer and more juicier so hang in there!**

**Thank you, Maddie**

It was now 530am and all arrived at the hospital. First Izzie, who annoyingly had always been on time lately, then George and Callie. Alex walked in with a smile.

"Well how long have you been here?" Meredith teased. Knowing he was just with Ava and that had been why he was grinning.

"Oh you know, not long." He smiled.

"Alright here are your assignments." Bailey said walking in, waking them all up. Bailey had always talked loudly but not perky loud, rather a confident loud. After all today she would find out who was going to be chief resident. She wasnt worried, the only competition she had was Callie.

But, Bailey told herself calmly that Callie was too young to become it.

Once all the interns started walking away. She paused for a moment remembering she had forgotten something.

"Oh wait," she said as they all turned around. "I have your intern exams."

They all looked excited- especially Izzie who thought she was right on the money. She was handed hers and yet out a loud "Yeah!" for all to see. It was obvious she had done well.

Meredith, less excited to recieve hers, had let out a relieving sigh, indicating that she had passed despite her breakdown with Webber. Webber, unlike Thatcher was there for her that day and had let her retake her exam without hesitation. He (Webber) was starting to feel more like a dad then Thatcher ever had been.

George and Alex had a proud look on their faces from their scores.

"You all did well on the exams." Bailey said as Dr. Webber walked in looking pleased.

Meredith leaned over to Dr. Bailey.

"We all did, right?" giving Bailey a look about Cristina.

Bailey then whispered, "Yes don't worry, Cristina did fine, the results are being sent to her as we speak. Who knows, she could be jumping for joy right now." she joked.

Meredith nodded showing Bailey her appreciation for making sure Cristina was alright with her test.

The interns (well residents almost now) all walked out of the room. Bailey noticed Chief Webber standing next to her.

"Something you need Chief?" Bailey asked, "Oh yes. Today is the day right? Not only do you name chief resident but you also name the chief of surgery."

Not needing to be reminded Webber nodded. "I was wondering," he paused, "today ill be in meetings all day with the contenders and could you just make sure to sort of cover for me, if say theres an emergency surgery or something. I've got so much to do today."

"No problem Chief I'll get right to it." Miranda said whole-heartedly and walked down the hall.

"Oh and Miranda," said Dr. Webber, "after Burke and Cristina's wedding could you meet me in my office at around 8. I need to talk to you about something."

"Yes, I'll see you at 8." Bailey then walked away confidently. She had felt like Chief resident already.


	3. Confrontations

**Here's the next chapter, a little lengthier. Enjoy!**

**I do not own Grey's. If I did I'd probably be extremely excited for the table read they have sometime next week. And I'd also work up the nerve to give Heigl a piece of my mind. But I don't own it so instead I'll be imagining Rhimes giving Heigl that bit of information that I desperately want to say to her myself.**

Half the day had passed and now all the interns were eating lunch at their usual table.

"Wonder where Alex is." asked Izzie. Ironically it was only her and Meredith at the table. George was with Callie, Cristina was getting ready for the big day at home and Alex was apparently nowhere to be seen.

But before getting into guessing where he was- (more like knowing he was with Ava) Meredith sat up and saw Derek leaving the cafeteria.

"I'm sorry Iz, I have to go," Meredith said, "you okay sitting alone?"

Izzie right away saw George leaving Callie's side. "Yeah, I'm fine." she smiled. "I'm good, you go."

Meredith throughout her tray and followed close after him.

"Derek!" she shouted.

"Hi." he said shortly.

"What's wrong?" Meredith asked.

"Oh, I don't know." He started. "I havn't seen you in awhile.. we never seem to talk anymore..."

"I know." she said, "I'm trying to communicate."

"Why didn't you talk to me about what happened with your father before the funeral, and why did you have to retake your exam after testing was over?" he asked.

"Well," she started, "it's complicated."

"No its not," he said with anger. "Mer, I'm in love with you and still you won't talk to me. I'm trying to make an effort and be there for you but you won't let me."

Meredith nodded knowing this was pretty true of her. "I know," she said, "I just- I just can't put myself out there, I'm trying, but-" she said but was cut off by Derek.

"I don't know-" He stopped. This was the women he loved and had hoped of spending the rest of his life with. But he wasn't sure about how Meredith was feeling or had felt within the last couple of weeks considering they hadn't talked. "I don't know how much you really want out of this relationship."

Meredith's heart sank. She couldn't imagine her life without Derek. But she just stood there, not knowing what to say.

Derek suddenly turned getting a page from Dr. Webber. Derek took a deep breath knowing that he now was about to see him about the chief of surgery spot.

"I've gotta go" he said, "I'll see you at the wedding." And with that he walked away.

Meanwhile Izzie got up and walked over to George. They hadn't talked since the incident in the elevator and she wasn't sure how much longer she could stand the silence.

"So, you're going to the wedding right?" She said, trying to break the ice.

"Um, yeah." He said nervously.

"George," she started, "Com'on we can talk, we're friends?"

George laughed at this. "Friends who kiss in elevators?"

At first Izzie thought it was funny but then realizing that Geroge had in fact not meant it in a funny matter.

"I'm married." Was all he had to say.

"I know." She said softly. "But you're not going to Mercy West right?"

"I got the spot." George answered, unsure of how she'd take it. Right then, George got a page from none other than his wife, Callie.

"I gotta go." George said.

"Ok." was all Izzie could think of to say as he walked away. George was leaving, for good.

While the other interns seemed to be having a rough day, Alex on the other hand was not. He had been with Ava, helping her with the baby. They were becoming closer and closer friends.

"So," Eva asked with a smile, "What's going on with you and Addison? I heard she and Mark are over."

Alex stared at her trying not to smile. "I don't know what's going on with her."

"Oh, com'on. Give me more than that. Are you and her together, are you not together?"

"Well, I sorta, screwed it up." Alex said hesitating.

"Of course you did, you're stupid." Ava laughed.

Alex smiled, "Wow thanks for the support."

"So.. what happened?" Ava asked.

"She asked me to go back to her appartment to help me study."

"Yeah.. and??"

"I couldn't do it. I don't even remember what I said but I know it was mean." Alex answered. "And then she just got up and left."

"Stupid, stupid man.." Ava started. "You like this woman right? Right-of course you do. So why not try to be with her?"

"Because.. she thinks I'm this perfect guy, who is responsible and is ready for responsibilities. And I'm not. I don't want to settle down. Not yet anyway." He sighed.

"Yes but eventually you want to. I think that's what Addison meant. With Mark all he wanted was sex, she could never marry him or be in a relationship with him. But maybe she saw how good you are with me- I mean your patients," she said trying to catch herself, "and saw a different side to you. Someone who's there and not just sometimes but all the time and even though rough around the edges, but he's kind hearted."

Alex blushed. Then returning back to his cool self, "Well she's leaving anyway so who cares." He then turned around and started heading out the door, when he heard Eva mutter something.

"Not if you stop her."


	4. Decisions

**I like this chapter. I don't really know why but I just do. P****robably because there's a flashback in it. So this may be obvious, but the words in italics, yeah that's the flashback scene. **

**I just want to say, thank you to those of you who have commented. I love hearing what you guys think and have to say about my writing. Thank you to everyone who is reading this fic as well.**

**So yeah, I still don't own Grey's Anatomy. Although apparently there's a chance Preston Burke will come back, due to Isiah talking with Shonda Rhimes. If this is true, I think I'd be a little thrilled to have his character return. But he would have a lot of explaining to do like why in the world he didn't credit Cristina when he got his Harper Avery Award?**** Hm. So now part of me is excited because if he were to come back, maybe that question could finally be answered.**

**I apologize for the overly long disclaimer above.**

Cristina still at home, just sat on the edge of her bed, not knowing what in the world to do. Surgery was her life and yet today she was trying something new.

Marriage. Cristina had no idea what that word meant. Who was she kidding? Sure she could save a life, but she didn't know how in the world to be a wife. There wasn't some book she could read or someone who could sit her down and give her a lecture or procedure. It was something she just had to face.

Now, knowing it was almost 2:15 pm, Burkes mother along with hers were about to arrive.

'I must be out of my mind.' Cristina thought. But she had already decided. She was getting married to Preston Burke today, in just a matter of hours.

--

Derek, now almost shaking, preparing himself for what he was about to tell Dr. Webber, slowly walked down the hallway. His dream was to be chief. But he had a bigger dream, and he knew he had to sacrifice it.

Right before he was about to walk into Dr. Webber's office he ran into Burke.

"Hey. Congratulations on the big day." Derek smiled.

"Thanks." replied Burke. "But if I'm going to get married I'll need my right hand man to be there."

"Don't worry I know be at the church at 4. I'm your best man, I know what I'm doing." he laughed even though he was having a bad day today. But today was Burke's day, and despite what was going on in his love life he was happy for Burkes.

"Sorry," Derek said, "but I gotta go."

Burke noticed that Derek was about to walk into Dr. Webber's office. "Oh, yeah. Good luck."

"Yeah," Derek shrugged, "have you talked to him yet?"

"No." Burke said shaking his head, "no, not yet anyway."

"Okay." Derek smiled and went into the room.

Burke had lied. He remembered what Webber had told him yesterday..

-

_"Dr. Webber?" he asked, as he walked into his office._

_"Ahh, yes," Dr. Webber replied, "sit down please Burke."_

_As Burke sat he started rattling his hand against the table. 'I am the chief' he thought to himself._

_"Burke, there is a reason I asked you in here today. You're a very respectable doctor, the best heart surgeon I can think of, you know your needs and your patient's needs and that impresses me."_

_Burke just stared at Webber, waiting for those words to come out of his mouth that he'd been waiting to hear for such a long time._

_"Tomorrow's the big day isn't it?" Webber said to clarify._

_"Yes sir it is." Burke told him._

_"You're a lucky man. Cristina is a wonderful woman and I know you both will be happy together."_

_Webber than took a long pause, as if he didn't want to continue on. But he knew he had to._

_"Unfortunately, tomorrow is also the day I decide who takes over my spot."_

_Burke nodded, sat up straight, and tried to act as if he didn't know what Dr. Webber was about to ask him._

_"Burke, I'm very sorry, but you will not be named chief." Webber stopped. He saw the disappointment in Burke's eyes. "I didn't want to tell you on your wedding day but I couldn't wait for you to find out who was Chief once you returned from your honeymoon. I'm so sorry."_

_Burke sat there stunned. Not knowing what to say . "I don't.." he paused, "I don't know what to say. Thank you for considering me Chief. I'm sure you will make the right decision."_

_-_

"Good morning Chief." Derek said with a smile on his face, trying to hide the fact of how nervous he really was.

"Derek, how are you?" Webber asked.

"Good." He replied.

"Well Derek, you know why you're here and.."

Derek interrupted him, "I actually wanted to go first if that's okay."

"Oh yes of course, what's on your mind?" Webber asked.

"Before we get into who's the new chief, I wanted to say this." Derek paused. He wanted to be sure that what he was about to say was what he really wanted. After reassuring himself, he knew. "I'm taking myself out of the race for chief."


	5. Some understand, while others Question

**Wow thank you for the comments! I love the feedback! Another lengthier update; enjoy! And please, if you get a chance, leave a comment! Thank you.**

AUTHORS NOTE: PLEASE DON'T KILL ME AFTER THIS UPDATE. IT WILL MAKE SENSE, I PROMISE!

**I'm sitting here watching Enchanted wishing I owned Grey's Anatomy because if I did, perhaps I too, could own Patrick Dempsey. Sadly, I still do not own it.**

**--**

"Ahh.." Dr. Webber said reassuringly, "I didn't think so."

Derek smiled knowing that Dr. Webber understood.

"There's just something that matters more to me, and I don't want to lose her- it." He blushed. "But thank you for giving me this opportunity."

"You've always known what you've wanted Derek, I'm proud of you."

With that, Derek started to walk towards the door. "I'll see you at the wedding right?"

"Yes, I believe so," Webber replied, "see you soon."

--

George, after talking to Izzie, walked quickly down the hallway. He heard Izzies voice and it brought tingles to his skin. Did he love her or was it the guilt? He wasn't exactly sure. He knew they needed to talk, before this mess got bigger, but not now, and especially not in front of his wife.

"Where have you been, I paged you 10 minutes ago?" Callie asked.

"No where sorry. Why'd you page me, nothing surgical right?"

"No, I just wanted to see you," she said smiling, "I want to talk to you about something, can you come in here for a second?'

Pulling him into the on-call room she kissed him and told him she missed him. As much as George felt the same way, he couldn't stop thinking about the Izzie problem.

"I missed you too," he heard himself say, "What do you want to talk about?"

"Well I have two good things to tell you," she sat him down on the bed, "First, what do you think about kids?"

George sat there for a moment thinking why in the world was she asking him this. "They're fine- they're, um.. kids, why?" he asked confused.

Callie took a deep breath. "No I mean, what do you think about us, about us having kids."

"Now?" George screamed standing up from the bed.

"No, well yeah. I mean we were going to have them eventually, right? And right now's a good time: your ending your intern year, we will both be residents.." Callie then looked at George, "You're not happy about this?"

George started pacing back and forth in the room. "We havn't even talked about kids- let alone having them! Yes eventually but, now, right now? I don't think- It's just, no one else is having kids, and I don't know if now is the best time."

"No one else is having kids?" Callie asked. She stood up angry. She knew what this was about. "Is it because of Izzie? What, you don't think she'll approve with this?"

"No," George tried to laugh, "What does Izzie have to do with this?"

"Oh I don't know, everything! I see the way you guys look at each other. Something's going on. The way she didn't approve of our marriage, even of us dating. She has feelings for you George."

"Nothing's going on, com'on Callie." he tried to grab her hand.

"No, I'm so stupid, I've been noticing it for weeks, everyone's been noticing actually." Callie felt a tear drop to her cheek.

George just stood there. 'Say something,' he thought. But no words emerged.

"Fine, whatever. Don't talk. I'm done." she started towards the door, "By the way, I wanted to also tell you that Cristina and Burke needed a singer for their wedding, and I agreed to it. So, you're going to have to just walk down the aisle alone!" and with that she walked out and slammed the door.

--

Alex walked out of Ava's room, remembering what she had said. Right at that moment he ran into her.

"Oh, sorry." Addison muttered. "So busy with labs- not watching where I'm going."

A big box had fallen out of her hands. Alex being the man he is, leaned down to it.

"No I got it," Alex said picking it up noticing it had all of her belongings in it.

"Oh right your leaving tomorrow." he said trying not to show any sort of emotion.

"Yes I am. Flights at 10 a.m." she said as both of them stared at each other. "So I better go, gotta pack up."

"Right." Alex said. "But you're going to the wedding right?" That was stupid, of course she was.

"Yes, I'll see you there." As she turned to leave she said, "It's been a pleasure working with you Dr. Korev." And she walked away.

Alex walked back to the locker room to get ready for the wedding. He had never felt so awful. She was really leaving.

-

Bailey, like all the others was also about to leave the hospital to get ready for the wedding. Burke had already left and she was really the only one who hadn't left.

She headed to the door when something caught her attention on the other side of the room. She saw the white piece of paper and as she walked over to it she already pictured her name next to cheif resident.

Bailey grabbed the white piece of paper and her heart sank.

_Chief Resident...Callie Torres_


	6. Something Good

**Um, so I know last chapter sort of left you with a, "huh, what?" sort of face, but please comment and let me know what you all think- even if it is negative feedback. Would you all like me to continue, because we havn't even gotten to the best chapter yet (which will be the next chapter!)! So please, if you get a minute, leave me some feedback! Thank you.**

AUTHORS NOTE: Next chapter will be the final for season 3, and then it will pick up for season 4. This chapter sort of opens it all up. Enjoy!

**If I owned Grey's Anatomy, I may know a thing or too about what's going to happen next season. Well, I don't own it, so obviously besides the spoilers I've heard roaming around, I really have no idea what's in store next season, but I can't wait to find out!**

**--**

Burke stood in the church alone. He had arrived quite early but he liked to be the first one there. Even though he wasn't going to be chief he couldn't be more happy to be getting married, especially to Cristina. She was his opposite but that didn't scare him at all. He couldn't imagine being with any other woman and he had never felt this way about another woman in his life.

Moments later Cristina arrived at the church a bit early too, but with Meredith by her side she knew she could do it. Meredith and her walked into the church and into the room where she would get her wedding dress on, fix her hair, do her make up and say I do.

"You excited?" Meredith asked a little to jumpy for Cristina.

"You don't need to convince me. I'm doing this and I'm not talking myself out of it."

"Good." Meredith replied.

"Burke's probably already here." Cristina said.

"Really, this early?"

Cristina couldn't explain it but she could feel him within the church. She smiled and Meredith helped her get ready.

--

Later, Izzie walked in.

"Wow you look pretty." Izzie said to Meredith, the maid of honor.

"So do you Izz."

They both already had their dresses on.

"But," Meredith started, "you want to see someone really pretty?"

Cristina walked out of the dressing room in a strapless sparkling white wedding dress. Her hair was pinned back perfectly. She couldn't help but smile.

"You look amazing." Izzie and Meredith said together.

"Yeah yeah.." Cristina said rolling her eyes.

The door suddenly opened. Izzie rolled her eyes while Meredith nudged her hard.

"Hey Callie." Meredith said.

--

Meanwhile, while the crowd started to all sit down, Burke was talking to his best man Derek, who was reassuring him that all would be okay.

"You ready man? It's almost time." Derek asked.

"I can't wait. This is something I've been waiting for and looking forward to so greatly." Burke said.

"Well, you guys are made for each other. You have nothing to worry about. When two people are right for each other nothing can stop them from being together." Derek suddenly stopped and saw Meredith opening the doors to the church. He smiled just to see her. Despite their fight they'd already had today, just seeing her made him happy. He couldn't help but feel sad thinking her and him were over.

Callie walked down the aisle. Not to any music or anything- the ceremony hadn't started yet. But she got to the mic stand and started talking to the band.

"What is she doing?" Izzie asked Meredith in a confused manner.

"I think she's singing." Meredith said.

"No, there's no way she's singing, can she even si-" with that Izzie stopped and saw George walk in.

"Where have you been?" Meredith asked him.

"Sorry rough day." he said then gave Izzie a hard look as if he was mad at her.

"What?" she asked.

-

The music started as Burke stood at the alter waiting for Cristina with Derek next to him. First down the aisle was the flower girl.

"That's my niece." Burke smiled to Derek.

-

While she walked down the aisle, Meredith was still in the dressing room with Cristina.

"I can't do this! Am I crazy? Getting married! How could you let me agree to this?"

Meredith laughed. "Cristina calm down! You're just getting last minute jitters. This is what you want. You love Burke. This is something good. This is supposed to happen. You love him, and he loves you. You'll be happy forever. Don't you realize how lucky you are? People wish and try to have that and you finally have it. Now, let's go down that aisle."

Meredith watched Cristina stand up with a smile. "Alright, fine!"

While Cristina walked out of the room Meredith saw herself in the mirror. She imagined herself in a wedding dress walking down the aisle to the most romantic music with the man of her dreams; Derek.

'Meredith stop! You and him are over.' She tried to tell herself this over and over again. But she simply couldn't believe it.

Alex was in the back of the church as well. His job was to get everyone down the aisle. "Alright now that Cristina and Burke's mom are down the aisle, I need two more."

George walked up to Alex. "But Callie is singing, who am I possibly going to walk down with?"

"Izzie!" Alex yelled.

"No no.. Not Izzie, why izzie?" George whispered.

"Chill out George I gotta get you down this aisle in 15 seconds. Oh good, Izz you're up next."

"Ok with who?"

Alex looked at George.

"Seriously?" she asked.

"Alright ready, you're on."

George and Izzie walked down uncomfortably. As they kept walking everything became easier. George looked into Izzies eyes smiling, as if the rest of the world didn't matter.

Callie still singing didn't look too pleased. _Something must be going on.._

As they came to the alter George let go of her hand and she went one way while he went the other, both still with smiles on their faces.

--

Meredith was in the back about ready to walk down. She smiled at Cristina who smiled back.

Meredith made her way down the aisle slowly. She looked into the crowd with a slight smile on her face. She looked down the aisle and her face froze. She stared straight at Derek. She tried to look elsewhere, but she couldn't do it.

Derek stared at her the whole way down too. He thought about how beautiful she looked, and how he wished he could walk her down the aisle. Meredith finally walked up to the alter standing straight across from Derek. You could tell they still loved each other.

Suddenly as if Meredith and Derek had forgotten why they were in the church at all, they turned their heads and both watched Cristina walk down the aisle. She looked as nervous as ever but once she saw Burke, her face lit up. Callie's song ended once Christina got to the alter.

--

The ceremony went by surprisingly quickly. Before they knew it they were on their "I do's."

They both said I do while they held each other's hands. Next, came the rings which fit each other's fingers perfectly.

Cristina was never big on rings but when he slipped it on her finger she knew this was right, and shed be wearing the ring for the rest of her life.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride." said the priest.

They kissed and the priest went on, "Ladies and Gentlemen I now present Dr. and Dr. Burke."

Everyone cheered and applauded.

Meredith and Derek couldn't be more proud of their friends they hugged them and wished them a safe honeymoon.

"You guys are coming to the reception right?" he asked.

"Yeah," Derek and Meredith both said together, "We will see you there."

The Burkes now turned and started to get in their car on the way to the reception. Derek and Meredith just stared at each other.

"Well," she said, "I better get changed."

They both walked away and left the church.

--

Bailey had sat in the back of the church, too upset to really say much. She had wanted to go to the reception but now all she could think about was not being Chief resident.

She had decided not to go to the reception after all. Instead she headed back up to the hospital. She had to go talk to Dr. Webber at 8. She had no idea what it could possibly be about.

--

Meanwhile, Dr. Webber, had decided to go back to the hospital after the wedding as well. He had a lot of thinking to do about the new chief plan and he had to gather all of his things. After all there was a new chief of surgery.


	7. Secrets and surprises

**SUPER LONG CHAPTER AHEAD!**

**Thank you for your comments! I'm glad to here you're all enjoying it so far. This is the last update that consists of Season 3, which means chapter 8 will be of my Sea****son 4. I've been updating pretty rapidly lately and that will probably change due to the facts that I only have so ****much written of this story**** and still need to continue to write this story along with my new one which will be called: Hold you in my Arms. That story will probably come out at the end of June or so. But I will tell you, that I wo****uld never hold updates over your heads, but comments do motivate me (:**

**So here it is. The way I would have ended Se****ason 3..**

AUTHORS NOTE: No this chapter is not ment to confuse you! _Italics are voice overs by none other than Meredith Grey. **Italic and Bolded words are flashbacks.**_

**Disclaimer: For obvious reasons of this fic, I do not own Grey's. I mean for Pete's sake I'm rewriting their Season 3 finale. It was just a little too depressing for me that I needed some hope, and what better way to create this hope then write**** what I would have liked to have ****happen. I am not the Genious that is**** Shonda Rhimes though because I won't dare rewrite the Season 4 finale that is brilliance. Plus Shonda owns Grey's Anatomy, and only a Genious could come up with a show like Grey's. I am not Shonda Rhimes, hence my lack of Genious and lack of Grey's Anatomy.**

IF THERE IS SOMETHING YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND AFTER READING THIS (BECAUSE I KNOW SEASON 3 WAS A LONG TIME AGO) AND YOU NEED A CLARIFICATION, PLEASE ASK AND I PROMISE I WILL REPLY TO YOUR QUESTION! THANKS.

--

Everyone cheered as the Burkes walked into Joe's bar, where the reception was being held.

"Congratulations!" Olivia said.

"We're so happy for you two." said Joe and Walter who were standing behind the bar.

"Thank you." they both said.

They told everyone how grateful they were for them being there. Then, they opened gifts and soon speeches were being made.

"Congratulations to the both of you and may you two live a long and happy life together." Addison said to the both of them.

Mark as well said some nice things. And even though he used the word hitched over and over again, Preston and Cristina were still glad he came.

Meredith unfortunately was not in a party mood. As happy as she was for them, she was still sad about the direction her and Derek were heading. So she sat at a table, not drinking, not eating, not really doing anything. She couldn't get her mind of Derek.

Derek had come in late but he still got there. He congratulated them again, but like Meredith was also in that same mood.

Soon everyone started dancing; some having too much to drink.

Mark was dancing with any woman he could find. Cristina and Burke danced together slowly and just stared into each other's eyes completely happy.

"Thanks for marrying me." Said Burke.

"Yeah, yeah.." she replied, but couldn't hide her smile.

Meredith watched as they danced. She was so happy for her friends, especially for her person.

"Hey guys," Meredith said butting into their dance, "I'm gonna go, if that's okay, I'm so tired."

"Yes, of course." they both said. "Thank you for coming."

"Thank you for having me. I am so happy for the two of you. Have a great time on your honeymoon and a safe flight." Meredith hugged them both and left.

-

Addison was sitting at the bar, having a bit too much to drink. She was having a great time with her friends, and was almost not looking forward to leaving. Sitting next to her was Callie who just sat there, looking upset.

"Hey!" Addison screamed. "Where have you been?"

"I've been sitting here for the past 15 minutes. Here, give me your drink, I think you've had enough." Callie took the glass away from Addison.

"Have you seen umm.. Dr. Korev anywhere?" Addison asked.

"No I havn't- no no women, you're not going down that road again."

"Why not?" she asked. "I know I sort of cheated on Mark with him, but I don't want Mark. Plus who doesn't cheat?"

"Oh, our society.." Callie moaned.

"No seriously," Addison started "I had an affair with Mark, then Derek dated Meredith while we were separated, Derek and I tried again, but then he had an affair, Izzie had an affair, Richard had an affair- seriously who doesn't cheat in this dimension?"

"Wait what?" Callie asked.

--

When Miranda left the church she first headed back home. She said hello to her husband and told him the bad news; that she had not gotten chief resident. He didn't understand, but either did Miranda herself.

When he started getting upset that Miranda had not been chosen she told him not to worry, it was no big deal. And maybe it was for the best. She could spend more time with her husband and baby. She then told her husband she had a meeting with Dr. Webber at 8 so she had to leave.

"I'll be home later." she said.

When she got to the hospital, it was quiet. Most were sleeping, and it was passed visiting hours. Plus, Sundays were usually the least busy.

"Chief?" Miranda asked as she knocked on the door.

"Oh good, you're here. We need to talk."

--

_Ultimately, it's the little things in life that make it so worth living_.

Derek had been sitting for awhile. He then heard a slow song come on for dancing. He got up and realized that the only time he was ever happy was when he was with Meredith. He wanted to find her and tell her that. Tell her he was sorry for being short with her earlier, he just hates when they fight. Then he'd kiss her and dance with her for the rest of the evening. He looked around like a spaz but he couldn't find her.

"Hey Burke, where's Meredith?" he asked.

"Oh she didn't tell you, she left; quite awhile ago actually."

"Oh," Derek said disappointingly.

"Thanks for coming though man, I appreciate it." said Burke.

"My pleasure. Have a good honeymoon." Derek then walked out and left.

--

_But what do we do when we think we've lost that person that actually makes our life worth living?_

"I just don't understand?" she asked, "Did I do something wrong, is there a specific reason I wasn't chosen? Could I have done more?"

_When we've hurt someone, all we can do is sit them down and explain to them what went wrong_.

"Bailey, you've done nothing wrong!" Dr. Webber said.

"Then I don't get it? Why is Callie Torres Chief resident?"

"Because!" he said raising his voice, while pacing around his office.

_Or we finally get to hear the real truth once and for all_.

"I would like you be the next chief of surgery."

--

Meredith was at home, but doing the exact same thing she had done at the reception. She just sat there, with tears streaming from her face. She didn't want to feel this way. She hadn't felt this way when she was with Derek.

_It takes time to realize what you truly want in your life. Especially when you've been through the ringer._

She closed her eyes tight hoping she would stop crying. Instead a strange clip of memories came rushing through her mind.

**_I was fighting, I was swimming, but then I thought, just for a second- I thought, what's the point? And then I let go. I stopped fighting.._**

Meredith suddenly woke up but quickly she was pulled back into another memory.

**_Here's the important part, so you listen up good. Do you know how rare it is to find someone like Derek? He's still an optimist. He still believes in true love, magic, and soul mates. He's waiting for you, and if you don't come back from this, you will change who he is._**

Meredith wanted to cry but before she could she was yet again pulled into another memory.

**_Do you see her?_**

**_No. Sometimes we'll be in the exact place, at the exact same time, and I can almost hear her voice. But that's all you get. Moments with the people you love._**

Meredith couldn't contain her tears. She started to weep but once more she had a memory.

**_Well, I don't want to be here, I want to go back._**

**_We were told there wasn't much time._**

**_I'm out of time!_**

**_Well, were not sure exactly._**

**_It's not enough! Just a wif of Derek!.. It's not enough- I need to go back. Please, Please! I can't breathe._**

**_This will pass._**

**_It won't, it won't._**

Meredith opened her eyes, and tried to relax. She understood now what Derek meant when he said, "I don't know if I can breathe for you anymore." It all made sense to her.

'I need to want to live,' she told herself, 'And I did because I went back- I came back to life.'

With that, Meredith knew exactly what she needed to do. She grabbed her keys, jumped in the car, and pulled away.

_But what happens when we finally open our eyes to what's right in front of us? When we finally wake up?_

She had so many thoughts running in her head. Was she crazy? Had she gone mad? It was raining, and she probably wasn't even driving on the right side of the road. Luckily, it was a quick drive.

--

Derek was lying on his couch doing absolutely nothing. He didn't feel like doing much. The only person he really wanted to see was Meredith. He was starting to give up hope with her. Maybe it really wasn't meant to be. He turned off the lights and started heading to his room when he heard a knock on the door.

_Can a complete change of heart change the situation?_

Sopping wet was Meredith Grey.

"Hey." he said.

"Hey." she said back.

"What are you doi-" he started but Meredith interrupted him.

"Let me talk first. Remember you're the one who wanted me to communicate." she smiled and took a deep breath.

_Sometimes all we need to do is say what's in our hearts._

"We havn't been talking in awhile. And at first I figured it would pass, but it hasn't, and now I realize its all my fault."

"No Mer, it wasn't-"

"Please, please let me finish." she pleaded.

"Ok." he said.

"When I drowned.." she paused, knowing this was going to be a hard subject to hit.

"When I drowned it was partly my fault. Sure I got pushed in sort of, but I should've fought harder. I was so upset with my mother for calling me- for saying all those things to me. I was unbelievably happy and I thought that was enough, but to her it wasn't because all she thought was important was surgery."

_And when we finally admit the things we're feeling.._

She paused to take a breath, unsure of what he would think of the next part of her story.

"I saw Denny. I know that sounds crazy but I did." she said smiling. "He told me to fight, but I forgot what I was fighting for. He told me to go back for my friends, my work, my home.. and then he brought up you."

Derek noticed a tear in her eyes and he brushed it with his fingers.

Still, Meredith continued, "From that moment on I knew I wanted to come back. Because that was just our beginning and I wanted an ending. I want it all."

Then Meredith started to really cry and Derek hugged her.

_It can make a whole world of difference.._

"No wait, I'm not done yet, I've got to finish what I started to say." she said. "Do you remember when I woke up in the hospital bed and you were there and I already knew my mother was dead."

Derek thought for a moment. "Yes, how did you know that?"

"Because I saw her. And I talked to her. She told me not to give up and to keep fighting. And then she said-" Meredith felt more tears coming on. "She told me I was anything but ordinary."

_..when we learn how to breathe._

And she smiled. "I know that I'm dark and twisty, and sometimes crappy stuff happens to me, but I also know I would have never been "anything but ordinary" without you. You're the reason why I'm happy. And today when I walked down that aisle I realized something."

"What's that?" he asked with a tear in his eye.

_And when we are finally are honest.._

"I don't want to walk down the aisle alone. I want to be happy as often as I can be. And I can't do that without you." She started crying again. "I can't do that without my knight and shinning armor."

_Then we can finally believe._

Derek smiled the biggest smile Meredith had ever seen.

"Derek," she grabbed his hand and got down on one knee, "Will you marry me?"

GREY'S ANATOMY


	8. Doing the Impossible

**Wow, thank you for all you're replies! And some of you asked some important questions..**

Whatev3691: Yes, there is no way a Resident could magically become the Chief of a hospital and although this is my own Fic, I would not like to make my own rules. So although it seems as if Bailey would now be the chief, there's a twist. It doesn't really get answered until the next chapter and those to come though.

xx-crispy-mnms-luverxx: Thanks, don't we all wish that's how Season 3 would have ended, LOL.

McMackenzie: I get what you mean, although I like the idea of a woman proposing to a man, especially Meredith proposing to Derek. Derek's the one who wants the relationship to take it's next step forward, so I thought it would be nice to see Meredith grow a bit, and I figured there's no better way to show that other than her making her full commitment to Derek through her proposal. Now I don't want to give anything away, but McMackenzie, I don't think you will be disappointed with where I take this episode. (:

-- Yes I did say episode. This is episode 4.01 (well the beginning of it anyway). I don't plan on writing a full fourth season as that would be an entirely too long fic, but I will tell you when I have finished an episode. I will tell you I've got some good stuff planned for MerDer along with Gizzie. Will Gizzie make it, or won't they? And then, when will Callie find out about them? What's in store for Mark? Will Addison come back, or will Alex recklessly pout to Ava forever? And Burktina are married! How awesome is that?

THANK YOU TO EVERYONE ELSE WHO COMMENTED AS WELL: wiccanforever, merderfan93, beth1814, dempeo is lovee, dempeo forever. AND THANK YOU READERS!

**Disclaimer: They're are now rumors that Grey's did not start production today, even though they were supposed to due to the possible Actor's Strike. If I owned Grey's Anatomy I'd voice my opinion that there should not be another strike! Also I'd give someone a piece of my mind about how Ellen Pompeo should be the "Most Desirable Woman" not KH. Katherine Heigl, seriously?! But I don't own it so no one will listen to my opinions. Sad..**

AUTHORS NOTE: I'm going out of town tomorrow and won't get back till next week, so that is why I tried so hard to get this update up for you all tonight. Enjoy! And I'll update next week when I get back from Michigan!

--

_During our internship we all accept responsibilities. But eventually we take a step up, and move on to a bigger and brighter future. We take these steps everyday of our lives._

_Some take these steps in their workforce._

Christina and Burke opened the door to their apartment, the same as it had been before. As Cristina's dancing around and excited to be home; Burke's not.

"Alright! Let's unpack and umm, oh I'll just put this here.." Cristina puts her large traveling suitcase on their bed frantically as she runs to her dresser.."I just need to grab these.." She then grabs her scrubs and ID card for Seattle Grace and runs into the bathroom.

"You know, we don't have to go back to the hospital yet. We left California three days early." He says annoyed.

"Com'on surgery. We go to work, and someone's bound to have lost a limb or gone blind or maybe even there's something in CARDIO!" (Cristina says in a singing fashion.)

"I'm just saying.."

"I know but I'm a resident now. And I'm excited. So let's go. You're coming with me."

_In our relationships._

"How about this one?"

"What? No it's too big!" Meredith giggled.

The jeweler smiled, "Wow I've never heard that one before."

"That's my Meredith.. Oh I got it.. this one.." Derek laughed. It was a platinum band with a small; but not too small diamond. "Perfect?" he asked.

"Perfect."

_In our honesty and trust that we owe to the people we love._

"Callie.." George catches Callie in the locker room cleaning up.

"George I can't talk now, I've got so many papers I need to get sorted out before the new residents arrive, well not counting you considering you're already here." she said annoyed.

"But.. can we just talk for a little while?"

"I'm busy." With that Callie walked out of the locker room.

_But sometimes it's difficult to realize when we need to take these steps._

Ava walks down the hallway to an open on call room. She sees Korev lying there. Alex looks up at her.

"What are you doing?! You are on bed rest, you just had a baby!" He yelled.

"What am I doing? Look at yourself."

"I'm fine." he said, using Meredith's word.

Ava shakes her head. "You didn't do it did you?"

Alex sat up quickly and shook his head. "She left."

"Yep- stupid man.."

"I can't believe she actually left." Alex sighed in disbelief, lying back down on the bed.

"Maybe it's because you never actually told her how you feel.."

"How I felt." he said correcting her, while sitting up, "She's gone now."

"But you still have feelings for her, and everyone knows it." She walked up to him and lifted his chin,

"Now what are you going to do about it?"

"Nothing."

She looked at him surprised, as he stood up to walk out of the on call room, but turned around quickly.

"And get back into bed." He yelled.

_Until the day finally comes when we actually have to accept this responsibility, whether the people we love understand.._

"I told you I have to do this, it won't be for too much longer." Bailey said walking frantically around the hospital on her cell phone.

"I-- I know but Tuck, I have to be here. The chief stepped out for only a few weeks. Now we talked about this. I'm stepping in for him- he needs me. I know you need me too but this is my chance Tucker alright? I'll talk to you later."

_..or if they don't._

Miranda hung up the phone and pushed the locker room door slightly open listening to all the eager new interns ready for their first day.

--

"Sidney I get it, I do, but Bailey, she's good at what she does-" Izzie says to her as Sidney's crying over one of the bathroom sinks.

Sidney sobbing suddenly stops to wash her face off. "I know- I'm just, it's not fair- she stepping in for the chief? She's not even an attending. And Torrez.. don't even get me started on her.. ugh Miranda, she is a great person she is but I- I.." she sobbed again.

At that moment Izzie's pager went off. "Thank god." she said under her breath. "Sidney," Izzie put her hand on her shoulder, "I've got to go now, but you will be okay now alright?"

"Yeah.." she sobbed.."Okay.." And Izzie walked out of the bathroom.

"Psyco!" Izzie laughed shaking her head and walking out of the bathroom.

--

Meredith and Derek got out of his car and walked into the hospital, and at that exact same moment so did Burke and Cristina.

"Well, good morning." Burke smiled.

"Yes, it is a good morning." Derek replied.

"A very good morning.." Mer giggled nudging Derek.

"Ouch Mer, it's too early for dirty talk.." Cristina pretended to gag.

"What? Oh no, no, Meredith didn't mean that." Derek shook his head as he looked down at Meredith not realizing he was blushing.

"So, what's going on here?" Burke asked. Burke, being Burke normally didn't care about what was going on in peoples personal relationships, but he couldn't resist asking when he noticed Meredith too was blushing.

"Well, should we tell them?" Derek smiled at Meredith.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Well now we have too.."

"We're engaged!" Derek yelled cutting Mer off. He grabbed her hand..

"Wow, couldn't get rid of him Mer?" Cristina laughed. "It's a pop tap." She said lamely, starring at Mer's left hand.

Burke nudged her and laughed. "Congratulations." he said.

"It's getting sized." Meredith defended. "This isn't the ring."

"Sure Mer, sure." Cristina laughed as they walked into the hospital.

Der and Mer were hand in hand now while both gazing into each other's eyes until they finally realized they'd have to go separate ways. Burke and Derek walked onto the elevator, while Mer and Cris proceeded to meet by the main office to meet their new interns.

"You look happy." Cris said.

"I am. Extremely happy. How was the honeymoon?"

"It was good, but I needed to come back. I missed it here. The surgeries, the smell of fear, the pain in the ass interns, I just needed to come back."

-

"Wow that fast?"

"Yeah, she just showed up at my door, randomly a week ago; after you're engagement party actually." Derek said smiling pushing the elevator button.

The elevator doors were closing until Mark kicked his foot in to keep it from shutting. Burke and Derek suddenly stopped talking.

In a whisper, "Does he know?" Burke asked.

"Do I know what?" Mark asked confused.

"Nothing." Derek said angry.

-

"Before we got here, Derek told me he had to tell me something tonight, and to meet him at Joe's. What do you think he wants?" Meredith asked, while changing into her scrubs.

"I don't know why'd he want to go to Joe's, he probably just wants you. "Cris gave her a funny look.

"Oh, don't be weird. Oh my gosh.." Mer's face drops. "Do you think he will change his mind? He doesn't want to marry me.."

"Shut up." Cris remarked.

Mer tried to speak but Cristina hit her. "He wants to marry you. He didn't change his mind, you're just being your old paranoid self."

This was not like Cristina, she wasn't this supportive. But Meredith felt a strange relief when Cris told her, without hesitating, Derek definitely wanted to marry her. She just didn't want to damage him. She'd prove to him and mainly to herself that she could be a positive person. She knew she had a lot of issues to work through, but with Derek by her side, she knew she could do the impossible.


	9. Author's Note

**Oh boy.. it's been how many days since I've updated??**

**I'm so sorry guys. I know I need to update and the sad thing is I have an update ready for you all but my lap top is retarded! When I got home from Michigan my Word Document was locked because my "trial" of using it expanded so now I need to buy the application. The second I do, which will hopefully happen in the next few days, you all are getting an update! I am leaving for NJ this saturday for a week so I hope to update before I leave! I keep you guys posted!**

**Just a note: When I do update this, I plan on deleting this Author's note and post the next chapter as this chapter (chapter 9). Did that just make sense??**

**A big thanks to my readers and all who commented/favorited this fic. Love you all,**

**Maddie**


	10. Shut it up Barbie!

Haha, so who wants to hear a story..

I got home from NJ a couple days ago by plane. Funny because we drove to NJ. Our car was totalled! Yes, seriously! We were driving (luckily it wasn't me even though I am an excellent driver) and there was this truck carrying a huge boat and a tire or anchor thing or something (it came so fast we don't really know) came off of it and we went over it! We were airborne (I thought we were going to flip), and the bottom of the car was completely damaged! So yeah now it's totalled and we had to fly back and I hate planes so that was certainly an experience. Anyone else have any near death experiences?

I'm so sorry I havn't updated for quite sometime. I have not been able to fix my words doc yet, (I retyped this update- which took awhile, trust me- because I wanted to give another update.) Hopefully I'll fix my word doc this week and then I can keep updating this story weekly not monthly and I can get my next story, Hold You in My Arms, up soon as well. I hope everyone is having a nice week. Hopkins is on tonight.. any fans?

Special thanks to**MichaelaMike** for the suggestion. Sadly I have a ton of work in my word docs that I need to save for school and stuff so I need to buy the application. Plus I'll need it for more papers next year so might as well kill two birds with one stone, right? (Did I say that right? Is that even the right analogy?)

Oh, and I have to mention the fact that Breaking Dawn (Fourth Book in the Twilight Book series) is coming in about 8 days! Holy moley that's crazy! Any twilight fans?

Once again, thank you for reading, commenting (praise, opinions, randomness or criticism is all welcomed), and especially thanks for being pacient with me you guys. I so appreciate it. Love you all,

Maddie

**Disclaimer: It's one thing for the show Grey's Anatomy to not be nominated for the Emmy's but for Ellen Pompeo not to be is just a crime. If I owned Grey's I'd be sure to give Ellen 90 percent of screen time so she can show off her true skills. But I don't own it so I will wallow for her on my own.**

**-**

Shut it up Barbie!

Christina and Meredith continued their walk until they approached Alex, Izzie, and George while joined with all the other residents awaiting to meet their interns.

"All right everyone, lets get our heads out of our butts!" Bailey said loudly. All the residents immediately turned towards her. "Seattle Grace is essentially a teaching hospital. You were all mesely interns some odd weeks ago so you all need to step it up. Because the game is just beginning.."

"Wow she sounds more like Chief Webber everyday." Alex whispered.

"It's weird isn't it? Her being the half chief or something?" Izzie asked softly.

"I guess so." said Meredith.

"No she's just Bailey." George murmured.

"Who cares, lets just get this over with so we can finally get into surgery!"

"Whats up with Cristina?" Alex asked Meredith.

"Oh, she's just in withdrawl of surgery since shes been away for so long." Mer said rolling her eyes. "She even made Burke leave their honeymoon early. That's how desperate she is to be back here."

"Seriously?" Iz asked Cristina, "I would have killed to have gone to California."

"Shut it up Barbie." Cristina laughed. "Excuse me for rather being interested in cutting rather than lying on the beach and getting skin cancer!"

When Bailey finished her lecture all residents reported to their attendings they'd be assisiting today. They were told their interns would meet up with them after going over standard protocal with Bailey.

--

"What do we do after we get the heart started Karev?" Dr. Burke asked.

"We just took her off bipass and now have to watch for excessive bleeding or blood clotting."

"No wonder you passed your intern exam." Burke laughed sarcastically.

"Yeah," he rolled his eyes, "I thought all this questioning ended when I became a resident."

"Well either they ditched you or that's them standing at the door." he laughed.

Alex turned around and saw three guys and a woman standing nervously by the door. "You my interns?" he said boldly.

"Yes sir." the woman replied.

"Dr. Burke do you mind if I talk to them and go over the rules. Bailey directed us to talk to them before they can enter into a surgery to observe."

"Of course. Dr. Sheen can you page Dr. Torez? His knee injury also looks bad. I just have to work on the right chamber of his heart for awhile longer."

"Yes Im paging her now."

Dr. Korev then walked out of the OR to see his interns. "I have 5 rules. Memorize them.."

--

"Can you drop these charts off in 4112 please. Thanks." Callie said as she walked passed the nurses station.

"Callie!"

Callie quickly turned around with s smile until she realized who it was. "What is it George?"

"Nothing.." he said slowly, "I'm on my way to meet my interns, is everything okay?"

"Yeah everything is fine" she said while turning and walking the opposite direction of him.

"Then, I dont get it, are you disappointed over chief resident or-"

"No George just leave me alone!" she snapped.

George grabbed her arm and pulled her towards him. He thought about dragging her to an on call room to talk but they were already at the end of the hallway so there wasnt much of a difference.

"Did I do something?" he asked softly.

"Hmm I don't know George did you?" she began to stare him down. But not the funny stare Bailey had taught her so she could convince Dr. Shepherd to do a surgery.. no this stare was dealy. It was a deadly mean stare.

Finally he let go of his grip and watched her walk away.

--

"Dr. Grey?"

Meredith was working on charts before her rounds. She was also preparing to meet her new interns. And by the judge of it this was one of them. A young blonde stood infront of her with a coffee in her hand and a smug confident grin on her face. Immediately Meredith thought of Izzie by her happiness.

"Are you one of my interns?"

"Yep." she grinned.

Meredith wasn't normally a happy person. In fact she was the opposite of an optimist. And usually she'd yell at such a confident young intern.

Interns weren't suppose to be confident. Instead Meredith shook it off and smiled. She couldn't help it. She was all happy and perky and it was a certain nerosurgeons fault.

"Where are the others?" Meredith asked. Right as she asked she saw two gawky boys and a dark brunette woman walking towards her. She then proceeded giving a tour of the hospital and going over rules. But for some odd reason the dark brunnette couldn't stop staring at her..


	11. Thank God

**Miss me? Yeah I'm sorry I havn't updated for a bit. Unfortunately my computer is still screwed up. So I've got good news and bad news: The bad news- I havn't written anything after this update.. but the good news is I'll probably update a lot more frequently because, 1. I can just type it our on here, and 2. I can't access my other story that's partly written until I fix my computer so I can work on this story instead!**

**I also finished Breaking Dawn a few days ago so now I'm less destracted. Seriously though, all of your comments get me writing quicker. I have a certain direction I'm going to take this story to so please hang on for the ride.**

**Maddie**

**--**

**Chapter 11: Thank God**

"Ugh." Meredith groaned as she sat down at the table.

"What's wrong with you?" Cristina asked while taking a bite of her sandwich.

"You know," Merediith smiled sarcastically, "I should be happy. I should be all bright and shiny- and I am. Believe me. I've got this great guy who, let's face it I probably don't deserve because he's pretty perfect except for the whole ego thing but he's a neurosurgeon so it kinda makes sense he has an ego right?"

"Meredith?"

"Yeah?" she said while squeezing the ranch dressing onto her salad.

"Point?" Cristina asked in an annoyed tone.

"Right. It's just I should be happy but my freekin' chick intern won't stop starring at me!"

"Oh, a secret admirorer." Cristina laughed.

"Cristina- don't be weird please. Everyone knows I screw boys like a whore on tequilla. Well, I mean I did until- the whole S&M thing, but that's over now so.."

"Meredith!"

"What?"

"First of all I have no idea what your talking about and second you're being extremely annoying right now."

Meredith laughed and scoffed, "Not as annoying as my intern!"

Cristina sighed."Oh, thank god!" she breathed as her pager went off. Meanwhile Korev wondered over to them.

"You." Cristina pointed to Alex. "Sit down, but don't ask Meredith any questions or she'll never stop rambling."

"Really nice Cristina." Meredith said as she rolled her eyes, "Alex might be interested in what I have to say."

"Ramble Mer," Cristina corrected, "you ramble."

"I love the rambling." said and approaching male voice.

Meredith smiled and Derek sat down next to her.

"I'm sure you do McDreamy." Cristina rolled her eyes. "I'm off."

"Thank god!" Meredith mimicked Cristina.

"So, how's your day?" she grinned turning her attention to Derek.

"It's good." he smiled. "It's better now anyway." Derek leaned in until realizing Alex sat directly across from him did he freeze.

"Ahh.. Dr. Korev. How are you?" he said, pulling slightly away from Meredith.

"I'm okay." he said awkwardly. No one said anything until Alex got the message. "I'm gonna go.. sit somewhere over there so you too happy whatever can talk.. bye." he said as he paced quickly leaving the now engaged happy couple.

"Thank god." he smiled looking down at Meredith who now rested her head against his chest.

She looked up noticing their close proximity of one another. "Yeah, thank God." she said as they leaned into kiss.

"So I was thinking.." he started.

"Yeah?" she said, as he continued kissing her.

Slowly pulling away he grabbed her hand. "Meet at Joe's at 8?" he smiled.

She grinned. "Okay."

--

"Hold it!" Izzie yelled as she tried desperately to hold onto the load of paperwork a nurse had just handed her.

Somehow the elevator door stayed open long enough for her to catch it, only the last person she wanted to see was on it too.

They both stood there for a few seconds, unsure of what to say exactly. Izzie tapped her foot, feeling like the elevator was taking extra long today. Karma's a bitch, she thought momentarily until George's words cut into her like a knife.

"I'm going to tell her." he stated simply.

She let out a breathe she didn't know she'd been holding. "When?"

"Tonight. She needs to know."

Izzie took a deep breath. "Are you staying with her?"

"Honestly, I'd like too. She's my wife. We took vows." George stopped talking as he watched her head drop. "Iz.."

"I'm fine George." she smiled softly up lifting her head up. "It's good- it's great. She's your wife.. and we.. we made a mistake. People make mistakes. You should try to make it work with her."

George nodded. "I don't want to lose my best friend." he sighed slightly.

She stepped over and grabbed his hand, "You won't. What we did.. it's in the past. I'm your best friend. I'm here for you. Whatever you need. Making your marriage work isn't something you should feel guilty about. If anything it should be the other way around." she laughed softly.

George looked up at her. "That night.."

"I dont want to talk about it George." she said a little sharper now. "It happened. It won't happen again. So, it's fine."

George paused unsure of what to say next. Instead Izzie spoke first.

"It wasn't tragic though." she said softly.

He nodded. "I know."

At that moment the elevator dinged signalling their need to exit. _Thank god_, they both thought as they walked off of it.


	12. Karma

**Chapter 12: Karma**

_--_

_It's been a long day._

This was the thought running through Meredith's head as she walked down the hallway to her patients room with the news of a malignant tumor. This day had sucked. It had been a crap day and now, all Meredith wanted to do was have a quiet night with Derek. Except she couldn't have that quiet night because she had agreed to meet him at Joe's. She had agreed, and now she couldn't take it back. She kept racking her brain to get out of tonight.. she could act sick but that'd be a lame excuse. She knew if she told Derek she was too tired to go out tonight he'd be sweet and tell her not to worry, that they'd go out another night.

Except they hadn't had a night to go out for awhile. And when she would see him in the hallway, he would grin, a goofy grin, and say something cute about how excited he was for tonight. So she had to be a good girlf- _fiance _and go with him anyway.

Ugh, _fiance_. She couldn't even believe it. How embarrassing. Her, standing in the rain, covered head to toe, dripping endlessly. She didn't regret it, but she wished she could have done something more romantic.. something more _them_.

So, as she continued to keep walking slowly down the hallway in her daydreaming state she was suddenly startled when a hand reached out and grabbed her, pulling her into the on call room.

"What the-"

"Mer?"

"George? Are you okay? What's wrong? And why are we in an on call room?"

George sighed, as he started pacing, yet again, in the tiny enclosed private space.

"I screwed up, Mer." he gasped as he sank slowly on the bottom bunk bed.

"I'm confused.. what happened?"

"Something that'd never should have." he sighed.

Meredith rolled her eyes as she sat on the ground facing him, her back against the wall, "I need more than that George."

He sighed and looked up at her, "I don't even know where to start."

"George, " she said sweetly, "I'm the queen of screwing up."

"I don't think so." he shoke his head as he starred at the floor.

"If you tell me, and you don't have to, but if you want to, I'll try to help.. Maybe there's something I can do.."

He starred up at her. He starred into her as he spoke softly, "I slept with Izzie."

She was at a loss of words. "You... you.."

"I slept with Izzie." he repeated to himself.

"I'm.. you.. what? You.. Oh George.. Why? I mean how? Or not how, just.. What?"

"I can't believe this! Why.. what did I sleep with her? She's Izzie."

Meredith starred at him, now with defensive eyes.

"No Mer, I mean, Izzie's wonderful.. she's a wonderful person.. and she's, she's beautiful.. she's a wonderful person and I.. I.. I screwed it up before.. I screwed it up with us."

"You.. what?" Meredith gasped, not realizing this story was taking a spin at her.

He sighed sadly, "When you and I.." he started realizing how uncomfortable she looked, "Mer.. when we.." he took a breath, "When we had sex, I.. I was in love with you. And I'm not holding a grudge or anything I'm just telling you.."

"I know." she nodded understandingly.

"But.. but Izzie? I love her.. I do.. but not that way. In a sisterly way. Not in a sex.. or with benefits or anything way." he gasped, "Mer, you and I, we stayed awkward with each other for awhile and I don't want to go through that again.. I.. I can't go through that again." he started gasping.

"George.. George calm down.. you need.. well I don't want all the details, but you need to tell me what happened." Meredith pleaded.

He nodded in understanding, as he calmed down, "We.. we drank.. A LOT. We drank a lot. And Callie.. Oh god Callie.."

"Does she know?"

He shoke his head. "What do I do Mer? How do I fix this? Izzie and I were drinking at your house.. and it was right after I had left the Artchfield with Callie because she was upset with Izzie for.. for something or other.. but she said.. she told me.." and a sudden realization hit him. "She told me Izzie had feelings for me."

"Did you believe her?" Meredith asked.

"I.. I don't know. Not really. Not at first. But then I got to your house and I thought.. maybe.. maybe I've been over looking what's been right in front of me. I did.. Mer.. I did.."

She nodded and said softly, "You did what I did."

George nodded. "So we kissed.. and it's all very fuzzy.. lots of alcohol involved.. and I just went with it. Which is horrible.. I did a horrible horrible thing. Because she's Izzie.. and she's so great. But.. but I'm not in love with her."

"George.. is she in love with you?"

"I.. yeah. Or atleast she thinks she is. The sex.." he gulped knowing this was uncomfortable to talk to Meredith about. But he need to talk about this with someone. He didn't know what to do.

"It's okay George. Whatever it is, it's okay to talk about."

"It wasn't tragic." he said looking at Meredith. "But it wasn't amazing either. It was.. it was just sex- for me atleast. We were drunk.. and I'm married. Oh gosh Mer, I'm married! And I was confused and now all I know is.. I'm not in love with either. I love Izzie.. with all of my heart.. but as a friend. As a best friend.. and Callie.. I love her too.. but.. my dad died. He died. And then we got married which was-"

"Weird." Meredith struggled holding back a laugh.

"Yeah.." he smiled sadly, "It was weird.. and impulsive. Izzie always said it was. But I was sad, and she was there. She was always there. And I needed her. I did. But.. I shouldn't have gotten married. If I was able to do this.. I shouldn't have gotten married."

They both sat silently for a few minutes until Meredith spoke up, "So what happens now?"

He sighed, "I'm going to come clean.. with both of them. I just don't know who to talk to first."

"Well.." Meredith thought.. "If you tell Callie first.. and she manages to get to Izzie before you do.."

"That'd be bad." he finished for her.

"Very bad." she nodded. "But if you spoke to Izzie, and told her how sorry you are.. if you told her all you have told me.. I think.. I think she'll undertstand George.. You did."

He smiled sadly realizing he was pretty much in Meredith's place last year.

"Karma." he smiled shaking his head.

"It's a bitch."

--

**Okay so.. I really really like this chapter. I've always valued Meredith and George's friendship. I feel like on the show that's not really recognized anymore. And I've always compared (in my mind) how similar what happened with Meredith and George to what happened to him and Izzie. And I felt like it may have been cool.. or maybe a better word is interesting for George to experience how Meredith felt and what she went through (all of that guilt) with what happened with them in Season 2 with the tragic sex. And now George and Izzie have good sex.. but it means more too Izzie than it does to George.. which is kinda what happened with Meredith and George. It was going to mean so much to George.. where it was just sex to Meredith.. tragic sex. He was in love with Meredith, but she wasn't.. and now Izzie is (or atleast thinks) she's inlove with George, but he's not in love with her. And now George is at the place where he needed to ask Meredith what to do. If you remember Meredith asked Alex for advice about the George sex.. and later on when everyone found out she even asked Izzie and Cristina what to do.. and we all know all you can do is apologize. So how will Izzie take this apology? You'll just have to read to find out!**

**And if you havn't noticed.. I updated 2 days in a row (even though it's technically 1 in the morning)! So.. pretty please I'd like some comments.. because this was a big and important realization for George to come to and I'****d love to hear your thoughts!**

**Maddie**


	13. A little bit of a freak out

**Chapter 13: A little bit of a freak out**

**So apparently I forgot my disclaimer last chapter.. sorry!**

**Double Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy. In fact, right now, I don't know if I'd want to because Shonda may now be on the right path again.. Meredith and Derek living together? Dare say in their new house! Holy heck! Finally! About 44 days till the season 5 premiere!**

**--**

"We shouldn't have gone through with the surgery today Mark. Her stats have been far too low this past week.." Derek grumbled as he walked out of the operating room to the scrub room, Mark following behind.

"Hmm.. I thought newly engaged couples were suppose to be happy?" Mark quipped.

"Who told you?" he asked displeased.

"It's been goin' 'round the hospital." he said simply, but Derek still was in a bad mood. "Com'on Derek. The woman's fine, she made it through the surgery."

Derek let out a harsh laugh, "Barely."

"Her face needed to be fixed." Mark acknowledged.

"Her face could have been fixed next week. It didn't have to be today. You just wanted some reconstruction." he argued. "Too bad it wasn't her boobs." he said harshly.

Mark became angry. "Look, I did what was best for the patient."

Derek paused from rinsing his hands to stare back at his no longer best friend. Then he sighed and said coldly, "Yeah.. sure.. you always do what's best for others, don't you?"

"What's that suppose to mean?"

He let out a sharp breath and went back to washing his hands. "You know exactly what it means. You only do what's best for someone else when it's convenient for you. You don't do what's best for the patient, you do what's best for you!" he said as he continued raised his voice. "She almost lost her baby Mark! You were being extremely selfish!"

"Derek.. if Addison were here.."

Derek rolled his eyes, "Oh don't even bring up Addison."

But Mark continued, "Addison would have gone through with the surgery too so just.." Mark shoke his head as he saw Derek lean against the wall. He knew what he needed to say. "Derek... Derek?" Mark repeated as he tried for his attention again.

Derek began heading for the exit before he stopped and slowly asked, "What Mark?"

He paused but then said softly, "I'm sorry."

Derek laughed. "Yeah I'm sure you are." and then he exited.

Mark sighed, not quite sure Derek understood what he was apologizing for.

GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGGAGAGA

"Izzie.. for the love of god.. will you just shut up??"

Cristina had been having one heck of a day. It was amazing to her how many people actually cared and were curious about her personal life. What part of _personal_ do people not get, anyway? She never realized how many questions could come out of people's mouths after only have been gone a week.

Her fellow doctors were pretty bad.. continually throughout the day they'd ask her what they should call her..

_"So what do you go by now?" Sidney giggled. "Dr. Yang," she said straightforward and professionally, "or... Dr. Burke?" and then she let out another obnoxious line of giggles._

And then there were the nurses who wouldn't get off of her back..

_"Dr.. Doctor.. oh you're back!" One of the blondes would squii._

_"How was it.. how was it..?" Another would ask incessently. "I mean not the dirty parts of course.. unless you want to share.." and then the whoo-ray of giggles would start up again._

Cristina did not understand it. The nurses HATED her. Like, seriously despised her. She didn't blame them. She even embraced their hatred for her. It made them slightly afraid of her and gave Cristina the advantage. And despite how annoying all of the gesters she had gotten all day, she'd give anything to have a conversation with one of those nurses.. or dare say Sidney Heron again then have to listen to Izzie right now.

"Seriously, stop!" Cristina said again, while nodging her as they walked down the hallway to see their interns as people began to stare.

"Sadie Sadie.. married lady!" Izzie continued to sing, loud and proud.

Cristina dragged her to the side of the hallway. She had had enough. "Okay.. See these?" Cristina asked sarcastically as she held up one of her fists, "If you don't shut up, it's going right through your face!"

Izzie began to really crack up then, "First of all.. " she continued as she tried to fight off her giggles, "I grew up in a trailer park, Mrs. Beverly.. and second.. you would never punch with your fists. You need them for surgery." Izzie said with great confidence.

Cristina sighed knowing she was right. She just really wanted to kick Steven's ass. When she looked up past Izzie, she saw Burke, her now husband walking down the other hallway.

"Hold that thought." and she was off. She ran straight to Burke and pulled him in the nearest on call room she could find. They needed to have a talk.

--

"Woah woah! Cristina!" he laughed as she dragged him into the empty room.

"I'm going out of my mind!" she shreiked.

Burke tried to hide his laugh, "Well, yes. Clearly."

She slapped his arm as she continued pacing.

"Ouch! That's not very nice." he said as he rubbed his arm slowly, still laughing about her freak out. "What's up?" he then asked calmly.

"Are people bugging you? I mean seriously bugging you? Like being all cheery and repeatively saying "Congratulations" as if they even care about our happiness?"

"Cristina, they're just being nice."

She shoke her head, "Nice.. nice? You call that nice? It's annoying is what it is!"

Burke laughed again.

"What? Why are you laughing at me?!"

He leaned in a gently kissed her on her forhead. Then looked back down into her eyes. "You." he said simply.

"Me?" she asked sweetly.

"Yeah." he smirked. "You're cute when you freak out."

"Ah." she gawked as she broke out of his grasp. "You're just as pepy as the others!"

He smiled, "Well yeah getting married tends to do that to people."

"Yes, _we're_ suppose to be happy! Not the nurses or Izzie or Sidney!"

He shoke his head realizing why she was freaking out. "They're just happy for us Cristina."

"Yeah well.. it's annoying, isn't it?" she asked seriously.

He laughed again, "A little bit."

She sighed, "Sorry I freaked out." as she looked down at the ground.

He tilted her head up and kissed her on her lips, "It's okay."

She smiled in his embrace.

"I'll see you tonight, okay?"

"Tonight?" she questioned.

"Yeah at Joe's." he stated matter a factly. "Shepherd says it's important."

He kissed her once more and headed back to work.

--

Author's Notes/Comments:

Ah.. Burke and Cristina. Wouldn't they have made a cute happy newly wedded couple? I think so. And I hope I demonstrated that through this update. And I have to admit, while I was writing Burktina it felt a little like MerDer. Because Meredith and Cristina are so similar relationship wise. This freak out Cristina was having, I could have so seen Meredith having as well. (Although I think Meredith would have been a little pepy as well). So now I'm a little bit more understanding of how in the real season 3 finale Meredith could have ended things with Derek because Cristina and Burke didn't work out. They were her hope.. for her.

Derek and Mark... Now Shonda went down the path where Addison leaves and all the sudden Derek and Mark make up in an episode and are friends again. Now me.. I didn't buy that.. (although I did love Derek's speech about Meredith to Mark in episode 4.01 in the scrub room). I think it's going to take a while longer until Derek can trust Mark again. And I think Derek's worst fear is that Meredith would hurt Derek the way Addison did. Now would Meredith ever sleep with Mark? Hell NO. She's not Addison. But did Meredith ever flirt with Mark.. say around the beginning of season 3 when Derek was being lolly gaggy about whether he was ready for Meredith or if he needed more time? Yeah she did. Did Derek ever find out about that? Well no.. but does Meredith know about Lexie yet? Does she know that Lexie already has met Derek..? Nope. --Okay that's all I'm saying about that right now.. Just things to come..

I have this thing where I don't like how Shonda brings something up and out of the blue.. and then just drops it like it never happened. So you may see me bring some things up that should have just been forgotten. But I can't help it. I love bringing things full circle.

THINGS TO COME: Right now in my fic land we're still in episode 4.01. Now my season finale lasted 7 chapters.. so if you're doing the math this is my sixth chapter for 4.01 (13 chapters minus 7 chapters 6)... so this means I should be done with this episode soon.

A big thank you to my readers and commentors. Please if you have a minute just leave a comment to tell me what you think of this story.. of this chapter. If you have any comments about my comments above feel free to agree/argue with me. I'd love to hear all your thoughts!

Thanks again!

-Maddie


	14. Remembering your regrets

Another update for you all! I'm leaving tomorrow night for the weekend so I'll try to work on the next chapter before I leave but it probably won't be up until Monday. Please leave comments for me guys! Let me know if you're liking this story! Thanks!

Maddie

**Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy.. Shonda does. And that's as simple as it gets. (Lame disclaimer I know, sorry. I have a headache.)**

--

Chapter 14: Remembering your regrets

"How are you feeling?" Alex asked, walking into Ava's room.

"Fine." she answered. "I think I'm ready to go home pretty soon."

"Go home?" he questioned, "Do you.. do you remember anything?"

She nodded. "Bits and pieces." she said not wanting to go on.

"Like.." Alex prompted, but Ava remained silent. He sighed, "Ava.. it's been months since the accident.. you must remember something." he said watching her face grow sad. "Unless you don't want to remember."

She nodded and said softly. "My name is Rebecca."

He smiled, "Well that's good.. that's something." He said hopeful.

But she shoke her head as tears appeared in her eyes. "I'm married."

"That's.." he started, then seeing the tears appear, "That's good.. isn't it?"

But the tears began to spill. "He's not looking for me."

Alex's face fell. "Ava.. Ava you don't know that. He could be..he may not recognize you.. or maybe he doesn't realize your at Seattle Grace.." Alex continued talked trying to think of excuses for a husband not looking for his wife.

"No.. no I was.. I was a jerk. We.. we were having problems.. and he tried everything to make it work. He's a wonderful man.. and then.. I was pregnant.. which was, the last, absolute last thing I wanted." she said, crying softly. "And I.. I couldn't handle it.. I couldn't handle it.. so I.. I left."

Alex was shocked. "You left? You just left?"

"Yes," she nodded, "and now.. now I'm going to raise this child all alone.. I'm all alone.." she sobbed.

But Alex shoke his head, "No. No you're not alone. Not if they're is still a chance. There's a chance you can fix this. You can go back to him and tell him.. just apologize.. apologize before it's too late.."

_You know.. um, I took that test.. Once upon a time.. We could um.. go back to my hotel.. I could quiz you._

_Look, this isn't ah.. you're not my girlfriend. Okay?_

_What?_

_No offense.. Today was awesome.. it's just.. I'm really busy and I have a lot of work to do.. so I don't have time for.._

_No, of course.. ahh study.. that's what your here for, right?_

"Apologize while you still have the chance." he sighed before exiting her room.

--

"Izzie?" George said softly, taping her on her back at the nurses station.

"Oh Jeez George! You scared me!"

"Sorry.. Look.. you gotta sec?" he asked.

She finished writing in the chart, handed it back to a nurse, and then followed George towards the stairwell, passing Bailey as they went.

"What's this about George?" Izzie asked.

He paused thinking of how to say what he was about to say. "It's about us."

Izzie sat down on the set of stairs while George stood by the wall.

"Iz.." he started, "You know that I love you right?"

She smiled up at him, "Yeah, I know that."

"Okay.. because I do. You're so special to me.. which is why I would never want to lose our friendship.." he started as his pager beeped. He turned it to silent, noticing it was just Callie paging him to talk and continued but was interrupted.

"George.. if you have something to say.. just say it."

"It was a mistake." he said softly.

"I know." she replied, now staring at the ground.

"Izzie.. I can't... I can't do this.." he said gestering with his hands, indictating her and him.

"Oh." she nodded, still looking at the ground.

"That night.. it wasn't tragic.. it certanly wasn't tragic.. but it didn't feel completely right.. did it?"

She paused trying to remember exactly.

"I mean.." he continued.. "we were drunk.. very drunk.. and we did something you and I had never discussed before.. I mean if we ever did we were always kidding. We were just best friends.. we were never going to be anything else.. and I guess I just want to stay best friends.."

"So you're saying.." she gulped, "you don't want to pursue anything besides friendship?"

"I guess I just.." he paused, "I want to know what you're thinking right now Iz."

She thought back to that night.. how right she _thought_ it felt. It was a nice.. but it wasn't amazing like she kept telling herself it was. It felt sort of.. sort of.. "It felt kind of forced I guess." she said unexpectedly.

George smiled realizing she'd found the right word. "Exactly. And Iz, I don't want this to ruin our friendship by any means.."

"Don't worry George.. I guess I just wanted you to be it. Alex had told me that night that I'd get over Denny eventionally and I was ready to be over him immediately. But we were drunk. And it was a mistake." she said as her eyes began to water. "And I'm so sorry."

He shoke his head, "Iz I'm sorry too. I'm so sorry. But I want to move forward. I want, more than anything, to stay friends."

She smiled sadly back at him. "Best friends?"

"Best friends." he agreed, moving to hold her hand.

"I really do love you George." Izzie said finally.

"Me too Iz." he smiled.

After a while they both stood up. "So what happens now?"

"We go to Joe's tonight so Shepherd won't kill us." he began as she laughed, "And then.. I tell Callie."

--

"Cheif Webber's office?"

"Bailey, holding down the fort. How's it going Chief?" Richard laughed, as Bailey began talking to Richard about what had happened today.

Dr. Bailey and Dr. Webber had come to an understanding. While he spent a few weeks at home trying to reconcile with his wife, Bailey would be in charge. While he had figured he would leave Burke or Shepherd in charge, he knew how much controversy and aggresiveness those two held over one another. While he wouldn't mind a little good competition, he needed to know his hospital would be safe for the weeks he had off, and he knew he couldn't trust anyone more then he could trust Bailey.

When he ran this idea over to the board, they had all thought he was crazy: leaving his hospital to a resident. But once they read over Miranda's records, they all agreed. She would be in charge until Richard returned and then once he came back, she would be given the Cheif Resident Position. All this was discussed with Callie prior to her getting Chief Resident in the first place.

Callie didn't mind. In fact she was grateful at all for at least given the oppertunity to try out the position in the first place. She knew Miranda deserved it and was more qualified for it than she was. So when she was told the plan she gratefully agreed and all went smoothly. Speaking of Callie..

"Miranda?" Callie asked, walking into the office. "Oh I'm sorry to interrupt. Have you seen Dr. O'Malley?"

"Your husband?" Bailey clarified, noticing Callie's upset expression. "Dr. Torres, are you alright?"

She sighed, "I'm fine Bailey. Have you seen him?"

She shrugged, "I think I saw him walking towards the north starewell with Dr. Stevens."

Callie scoffed, "Of course." she rolled her eyes.

"Callie.. is everything.."

"Everything is fine Bailey. But It'd be even better if he could answer his page once in a while." she scoffed annoyed, making her way towards the starewell. But once she got there and opened the door, she heard part of the conversation she wished she hadn't.

_"I really do love you George." Izzie said finally._

_"Me too Iz." he smiled._

--

--

**NEXT UPDATE'S GONNA BE BIG!**


	15. Expect the unexpected

Wow.. this is the end of episode 4.01. I hope you guys enjoy! I really like this chapter so I hope you all do too! Tell me what you think!

Self explanatory but.. italics are Meredith's narrations, but then a flashback comes.. also in italics.. yeah I'm pretty sure it will make sense so just read it! I don't want to confuse you!

Maddie (Oh btw.. this update's a little more PG13)

**Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy hence why I am writing fanfiction instead of writing for the show. (Yeah it's 1:15 am.. Can't think of a creative disclaimer.)**

**--**

Chapter 15: Expect the unexpected.

"Okay, I'm here." Cristina said annoyed, as she walked into Joe's, taking a seat next to Meredith.

_So in life.. responsibility will always continue to hit us. We can't stop it from coming._

Meredith smiled to her, as George ran right in after her, out of breath, "Am I late? I ran, I really did. Ask Alex." he breathed, as Alex then appeared behind George.

"Guys, it's fine. What's with all of you anyway?" Meredith asked.

"We were suppose to be here at 7- Ouch!"

"Idiot." Alex sighed, after giving George a light hit. "We're not suppose to say anything."

"What.. what's going on?" Meredith questioned, clearly confused.

"McDreamy told us to be here at 7. So now Bamby's freaking out." Cristina sighed rolling her eyes. "Joe, I need a large shot of tequila please."

Meredith laughed, "Newlywed troubles?" she asked, amused by Cristina's sourness.

"Oh, there's the newlywed!" said a high voice, now entering Joe's.

Cristina shuddered.

"Izzie," Meredith smiled, trying to hold in her laughter as Cristina through her shot back immediately, "Good to see you."

"You too." Izzie grinned, giving her a slight nudge.

"Okay- Seriously guys. What's going on?"

_It hits us in all sorts of places._

"Nothing.." Izzie smiled.

Meredith sighed, "Joe?" Meredith asked getting his attention. "Do you have any idea what's going on?"

Joe shrugged, "Nope." he said, trying to hide a smile.

"Liar!" Meredith grinned as looked around the bar, noticing Dr. Bailey, Sidney, Mark, along with others all at various tables. In fact, it seemed like most of the hospital was there tonight.

"Where's Burke?" Izzie grinned, directing her gaze towards Cristina.

"I'm going to hit you." Cristina said simply, throwing back another shot.

"He's still in surgery." Alex answered Izzie. "Ava's baby's stats are low so he went in to get a better look at her heart."

_In our jobs.._

"Is the baby okay?" Izzie asked.

Alex shrugged. "Depends I guess. I don't know. We're having a meeting about it tomorrow. Sucks because her and the kid were ready to go home earlier."

"Aw.." Cristina mocked. "Is Alex sad?"

"Be nice." Meredith insisted.

George rolled his eyes and shook his head in laughter until the bell rang, signalling another arrival. Callie entered with another resident on her side. As she passed George, ignoring him on purpose, Meredith noted the short exchange. Meredith gave George a look and he shook his head. "I will." he said softly to her, then shooting a look at Izzie.

Izzie gave a small, shy smile, trying to indicate her support for him and George nodded. He knew he would have to tell Callie when he got home, but he still dreaded the anticipation.

"How's my favorite dirty ex mistress?" Mark laughed, wrapping his arm around Meredith while she rolled her eyes. "Or is it dirty mistress again, since you and Derek are together and all?"

Meredith wedged her way out of his arms. "Neither." she giggled. "Derek's not married anymore."

"Ah.." Mark sighed, " But you'll always be in my dirty mistress club."

Meredith nodded trying to humor him, "Sure Mark, sure.."

Mark nodded, reaching for the bowl of peanuts. "So when's this thing over?" he asked, in between bites, "I'm starvin'!"

Meredith whipped her head around to stare at him. "What thing? Ugh, you all are so frusterating!"

Mark grinned, "Oh.. nothing." he said smoothly.

_In our relationships.._

Cristina scoffed, "You know? You seriously know what's going on? I'm starving too and I have no idea why the hell I'm here!"

"What's going on?" Meredith asked again, more desperately.

The bell rang again, announcing Burke, now entering the bar, heading towards the group.

"Hi everyone." he said, wrapping his arm around Cristina, giving her a kiss on the cheek before she downed another glass.

"Hey.. um.. how's ah.. Ava's kid? Is everything okay?"

Burke nodded slowly, shaking his head. "Right now okay, but I'm not real sure. I'm not an expert on infants. Which is actually what I wanted to talk to you about Karev-" he said until the bell rang signalling another arrival. As Burke turned to see who it was, his face instantly became excited as he stopped talking to Alex and moved towards the end of the bar.. further away from Meredith.

_With the people we love.._

Izzie grinned and tried to hold in her giggles. Cristina grabbed another shot of alcohol, while George and Alex followed Burke's lead over to the edge of the bar.

Mark slowly eased his way away from Meredith, giving Derek space to greet her. He shot Derek a grin who then looked up at Joe, nodding slowly. Joe nodded back and moved quietly to the edge of the bar, dimming the lights.

Meredith turned around, only to see Derek walking towards her. She noticed the chatter had quieted, the lights had lost their brightness and now all gazes were directed towards her. Even the attendings and residents who were in deep discussion had stopped abrubtly, starring between her and Derek.

"Derek.. what's going on?" she whispered as he finally reached her. "Everyone's starring at us." she noted, while Derek continued to grin. "Why is everyone starring at us?"

"Because I asked them to be here." he said softly, reaching to his back pocket.

Izzie gasped, as Meredith noticed Sidney's eyes water when Derek brought his now not empty hand back to Meredith. A small blue ring box, now in his grasp.

"Wh--What?" Meredith asked shocked beyond words.. "But I thought.. I thought.."

"I know." he whispered, smiling.

"The.. the box wasn't.." she nodded trying to control her emotions. Could he really be doing, what she thought he was doing? "You said the ring wouldn't be ready for pick up until next week." she finally managed to get out, breathing irratically.

_So it can be difficult when we realize it's time to take those steps._

"I lied." he said softly, tears now apparent in his gorgeous blue eyes.

"But.. we're already.." she indicated with her hands, her and him.

"I know," he nodded, still whispering, "but I wanted to make it official."

"Official?" she squeaked as her lips began to curl into a soft smile.

"Traditional." he whispered into her ear and Meredith shivered. "Not that I didn't love how you asked me." he added.

She giggled at his meaning. Yeah that was one hell of a proposal..

_"Derek," she grabbed his hand and got down on one knee, "Will you marry me?"_

_"Yes." he immediately answered, still in awe of her standing there._

_Meredith gasped at how quickly he answered, "You can take a minute to.. if you want.."_

_"No." he said strongly._

_"No?" she questioned, thinking it was his answer._

_"No- Yes. Yes I'll marry you!" he gleamed._

_"You'll.. you'll.." she whispered. "We're engaged." she said as she began to giggle._

_"Yes." he smiled, rubbing her wet cheek softly, "We're engaged."_

_"And I'm all wet." she laughed._

_Derek sinned himself for not letting her in earlier. "Oh, yeah of course.. come in." he smiled, opening his door wider for her._

_She entered his trailer dripping wet. He walked to his shower, turning it on immediately for her, as she began taking off of her shoes._

_"We're engaged." she said again, still in awe of her confidence. _

_Derek grinned, running back to her and picking her up in his arms, as it finally hit him that she was his forever. He kissed her passionately, before setting her down and leaning his forehead against hers, "We're getting married." he whispered._

_"We're getting married," she murmured, mimicking him. They both leaned in, until his mouth was on hers. She instantly grabbed his shirt, lifting it over his head, as they both walked towards the shower._

_He lifted her tshirt over her head, while Meredith then leaned down and pulled off her sweat pants. He kissed her again as she moaned when his tongue swept past her lips. He pinned her against the shower door, before Meredith broke away and unbuckled his belt, dropping his pants to the floor leaving them both in their undergarments._

_He opened the shower door. Before stepping in he grabbed her chin and looked into her eyes, "I love you Mer." he said sincerely._

_She grinned and kissed him again, as he picked her up and lifted her into the shower. "I love you too." she whispered, before they both lost themseleves in one another, after depositing the last of their clothing._

"Meredith Grey.." he said loudly, "I've asked all of our friends to gather here so that I may have the privillage to ask you to be wife." he smiled opening the box for her eyes. She grinned as her eyes landed on the ring that she had seen in the ring store she had just been at this morning.

He gently lifted the ring out of its box. One of his hands held Meredith's and his other settled the ring by her finger, but not yet on. He looked up into her teary eyes as he spoke.

"I never thought a love like this was real." he began. "I never imagined the feeling you get when you finally meet your soulmate. I remember walking into this very bar," he said as he stood up and walked to the seat next to Meredith, still holding her hand, "I remember taking this seat," he continued, "and when I looked into your eyes I knew this was it. You were mine. You were made for me.. we were made for eachother." he smiled.

"And a year later, look where we are." he gleamed. "You're it for me Meredith. You're the one I want to hold every night. You're the one I want to build a home with. You're the woman I want to be the mother of my children. You're the one I want to grow old with and die in eachothers arms. I want you. I always will and I always have. So I'm asking you to be mine forever." he said simply as he moved off the stool to kneel on his knee.

_So we accept responsibility and move forward._

"Will you do me the honor, and make me the happiest man in the world.. Marry me?" he asked smiling.

She nodded her head slowly. "Yes.. yes of course I'll marry you!" as Derek slowly pushed the diamond ring onto her slim finger and cheers erupted in the bar.

"Perfect fit." he murmured as he stood and Meredith instantly wrapped both arms strongly around Derek as he lifted her legs for her to wrap around his frame and kissed her.

A soft kiss at first that desperately turned passionate with people hooting and hollaring as they moaned into one another until they breathlessly pulled away, starring into eachothers eyes before looking at everyone else who was either cheering like Burke and Callie, or crying like Izzie and Sidney.

_Whether the people we love understand.._

Cristina and George clapped while he tried not the think about the fact that when he got home he'd be breaking Callie's heart. Not only that but he'd be ending their marriage.

Alex clapped as well until the bell rang..

It was hard to make out due to everyone's frenzic behavior, but it wasn't the bell that caught Alex's attention. It was the person. So he was caught in complete shock when Addison walked through the doors and into the bar..

_Or if they don't._

GREY'S ANATOMY


End file.
